Posted: 8:49 p.m. Tuesday, July 26, 2011
comment(4)
You all know the plot… The door bell rings, hot girls answer the door, nobody has any money to pay him, so they collectively agree on an arrangement that mutually benefits all parties involved and is nothing short of a bargain. Like I said, you all know the plot.
Anyway, guess whose door bell just rang?!?!?!! That's right! Mine!
There I was, face to face with the pizza delivery guy. Yet, I had ordered no pizza. I was sure of it. And I had not partaken in anything that would have caused me to forget anything my chubby little fingers had done in the recent past. Although, they have been known to jump into my nostrils with out me realizing it… Mostly while driving. And It's never until you make eye contact with an attractive woman that you become acutely aware that your fingers were obviously not comfortable in traffic and needed a place to hide.
Is this how the "Pizza Delivery Guy Porn Fantasy" goes down? I guess it makes sense. Out of all the successful Pizza Delivery Guy Porn Fantasies that have ever occurred, probability dictates that their will be those encounters that don't end up like either thought it would.
Luckily, he wasn't there to have sex with me. Which was good thing. Because I didn't have any condoms. He was on my doorstep because he was at the wrong house! Why was he at the wrong house? Muscle memory, that's why! Because me and my chubby little fingers order so much from them that anytime they're within a 5 mile radius of my place, muscle memory must take over and the next thing they know, they're just here.
Well, he's gone now and all this typing has made me hungry. So guess what big Fish is going to do?!?!! Nope! I ordered from them last night and have leftovers. As a matter of fact, my pizza heating machine (some call it an oven) is beeping. Gotta go!
-Fisher
comment(4)
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